I love memorable things. I love meaningful objects that remind me of someone, maybe they gave it to me, or someone else gave it to me after they had passed away, or even just something I had seen on my own and found beautiful, whether I bought it from a store or found it on a beach or in a library book.
When I was a young girl, one of my favorite things to do in the summer was to find seashells and rocks on the beach. When I first started collecting them along the shore, I used to think almost every seashell was so special and wanted to take each one, even ones that were very similar; I wanted to take a lot more than I could carry, so when it was almost time to go back, I would look at them and leave many behind beside the ocean. And the ones I carried, I would take home to display on my bedroom dresser. Until next time.
In my recent post titled Always, Grandma, I told how I had made my grandma a beaded bracelet, but when I went to pack it after hearing she might be passing away soon, the knot kept coming untied and some beads would fall. This happened a few times. So I made it into a string of beads which I think she enjoyed more, that she could hold. The beads that fell from the string that seemed too short for them, I placed on a decorative plate my mom had given me.
Last night, while I was visiting my family in Brooklyn, before I went to sleep, I placed my purple jade ring on the dresser in my childhood bedroom. When I woke up, I brought it into the bathroom and set it on the sink vanity, a pretty spacious area, went in the shower, planned to put it back on afterwards. When I was ready to put it on, I saw it was split in half. It was whole when I woke up and didn’t fall throughout the night. It was still on the sink vanity and did not fall either while I was in the shower. But there it was, half. I was disappointed that I couldn’t wear it anymore. I searched the bathroom and bedroom, the floors, looked in corners, under the dresser, under the sink, under the bed—the other half was not there. It was a mystery.
My mom had bought me these three jade rings when I was in high school: green, blue, and purple. When she saw the half ring this morning, she started looking for another purple jade ring online but hadn’t come across one yet. Very kind. I found a purple ring online, not jade but similar and very beautiful and was going to buy it, but she wanted to give it to me as a gift. I am grateful.
So here is the plate with the beads that broke off my Grandma’s string, the gems my cat decided he wanted to remove during his mischievous days from a little decorative tree my sister gave me, the almost heart-shaped purple stone that feels warm and fits perfectly in my hand, and the half of my purple jade ring. Well, hi from here to wherever the other half may be…hehe.
I have dark shadows in me and those shadows have surely reached others, unintentionally, carelessly, have split some things in half or not so perfectly in half. Now I believe it is okay to have some shadows along with your light. This plate with what it holds reminds me of both the shadows and the light. It is named well. Love.